Post by LuciasFalkner on Nov 13, 2014 14:55:30 GMT
Gods Chapter 1 was a mess when I first wrote it. I'm gonna post the drafts of the opening here for review and hope that one of them turns out well.
Celestine threw the book in her hand across the room. It slammed into the wall and knocked over one of the many stacks of manuals and tomes that littered her floor. With a sigh of frustration, she flopped down on her bed and stared at the ceiling. After a moment, she reached over to the stack that rested against the side of the bed and pulled a particularly large volume from the middle, making the others topple over and land in various ways. She opened the tome to a bookmarked page and read through it once, then twice, then a third and a fourth time. It was this particular volume of tips and tricks to channeling magic that had brought her closest to what she needed, and yet it still hadn't been enough.
Celestine's room was small, even for the standards of a tiny remote village like hers. It could barely house the bed, writing desk and small bookshelf that had occupied it before. Now, with the help of neighbors, she managed to acquire countless books on channeling magic through the occasional trader that would wander through her village seeking shelter for the night or just to see what the village might have available at the time. Even still, all of those books that now littered her floor and just about buried her desk had done nothing to help her.
There was not a single person in the world that was known to be completely unable to use magic. And yet Celestine couldn't. She could feel it flowing through her, but for some reason, she was unable to tap into it and bring it out into a 'physical' form.
Celestine continued to glare at the ceiling for a moment before sitting up and slipping on her boots. With a quick "Hello!" to her adoptive mother, Celestine dashed out of the cottage with the book in hand.
(I suppose that'll do for now. I do just want the opening right now, after all.)
Celestine threw the book in her hand across the room. It slammed into the wall and knocked over one of the many stacks of manuals and tomes that littered her floor. With a sigh of frustration, she flopped down on her bed and stared at the ceiling. After a moment, she reached over to the stack that rested against the side of the bed and pulled a particularly large volume from the middle, making the others topple over and land in various ways. She opened the tome to a bookmarked page and read through it once, then twice, then a third and a fourth time. It was this particular volume of tips and tricks to channeling magic that had brought her closest to what she needed, and yet it still hadn't been enough.
Celestine's room was small, even for the standards of a tiny remote village like hers. It could barely house the bed, writing desk and small bookshelf that had occupied it before. Now, with the help of neighbors, she managed to acquire countless books on channeling magic through the occasional trader that would wander through her village seeking shelter for the night or just to see what the village might have available at the time. Even still, all of those books that now littered her floor and just about buried her desk had done nothing to help her.
There was not a single person in the world that was known to be completely unable to use magic. And yet Celestine couldn't. She could feel it flowing through her, but for some reason, she was unable to tap into it and bring it out into a 'physical' form.
Celestine continued to glare at the ceiling for a moment before sitting up and slipping on her boots. With a quick "Hello!" to her adoptive mother, Celestine dashed out of the cottage with the book in hand.
(I suppose that'll do for now. I do just want the opening right now, after all.)